I dunno if I had to have sex with a country and this was somehow possible I would probably fuck Ireland. Probably regret it in the morning but, Ireland.
the nice thing about fucking sunsets is that they always go down on you
dont you dare think
for even a second
that nobody saw you
when you decided this waS AN ACCEPTABLE WAY TO PARK YOUR VEHICLE BECAUSE I SAW IT OKAY I FUCKING SAW IT YOUR CRAPPY PARKING JOB IS ON GOOGLE MAPS IN FRONT OF THE ENTIRE WORLD
how did you find this
me: i love [favorite fictional character] so much
me: no you dont understand
Tourist: Could you give us directions to Olive Garden?
New Yorker: No, but I could give you directions to an actual Italian restaurant.
Tourist: I came here to have a good time and honestly I am feeling so attacked right now.
at this point I’ve nearly forgotten that pirating movies and software is illegal